Monday, October 13, 2008

explaination

After yesterday's post I felt I probably needed to explain. First the back history. I hope I can do it justice.

Hubby and I are so different in soooo many ways. However, we are also very similar in several areas. One of which is that we are both two people who practically raised ourselves as our own parents were too wrapped up in the events/drama of their own lives. I'm not pointing a finger, just stating a fact. As adults we are like two orphans. Me not having a "normal" relationship with my parents even when we are speaking. Hubby having lost his father to breast cancer a little over 8 years ago and his mother having little involvement in our lives and being more like a sibling than mother.

Flashback to Hubby moving to Clemson after leaving the Army. First night home he met his new roommate. They clicked from the very beginning. This man brought Hubby into his family. Hubby spent several holidays with them and many a weekend trip home was to their house. Fast forward now to Hubby's senior year at Clemson. Interviewing. Stopped in to visit these old friends on his way back to Clemson from Charlotte. Sitting in their garden it was decided Hubby would come and work in the family business. He was like an adopted son. This is how Hubby got his start in sales and this is why we moved to York. This family is more than just friends, but an extension of us. We are where we are today in large part due to them. Flash forward now to Sunday morning. Phone rings. The matriarch has passed. Suddenly. Too much shock for words. Too many tears to count.

Then, less than 24 hours later, another good friend contacts me to let me know that her father has too passed this weekend. Her situation with her father is like mine with my family which stirs a whole different range of emotions. I had already come to the conclusion in the past several weeks that I need to come to terms with my parents. If for no other reason, my girls. Also to be at peace with the kind of person I want to be. I know I can't change others, just how I choose to react to them. Difficult times ahead.

7 comments:

Caffeine Court said...

You should reach out to them. It won't be easy but you'll be so glad you did. Good luck.

The Pink Owl said...

Hope things start looking up sooner rather than later. Sending good thoughts your way....

Belle (from Life of a...) said...

My hubby and I have unusual extended family situations also...I know how you feel. I'm trying to be a better person about it all but sometimes it's a challenge. Good luck!

P said...

I understand where you're coming from. I'm so sorry.

Meaghan said...

Thinking of you and hoping things get easier!

I launched my coffee website if you want to check it out www.getthebean.com and we are doing giveaways too. If you want to enter for the giveaways go to www.getthebean.blogspot.com

-Meg

Amy said...

Wow, I somehow missed this post...sorry! I am so sorry to hear about this. I am terrified of the day when I lose my version of what you are talking about! Thinking of you!!!!!

Pink Flamingo said...

I'm so sorry to hear this. I hope that time will ease the pain. Please know that I am thinking of you...hang in there!